Welcome! - In the Beginning....

I am so excited about this blog for a number of reasons... and will try my best to keep it up to date each day, if not each week. I am a busy stay-at-home mom of 3 little kids and a stepmom to an almost teenager. I have been married to my charm for almost 7 years, longer than my 1st two tried marriages that I tried to work through the devastating decisions & actions brought upon themselves and despite their unwillingness to work with me through it all. I swore I would never remarry again... but LOVE kind of sinks into the heart, attaches to your soul and you just want to embrace it tightly. I was cautious, though things happened quickly after my 2nd divorce... I knew that I had to keep the baggage I carried out the door and start fresh from day one if I were to engage into another relationship and marriage. I knew that we needed to work hard each day to continually enhance our marriage relationship. I have always loved self-help books and classes that strengthen ourselves and our relationships with others, esp our spouse. I have discovered a handful of techniques that are absolutely eye openers, at least for me they were and continue to be a positive part of myself and what I strive for. Despite the knowledge, the discoveries, the insights I personally have had - no marriage comes 100% flawless. There will be issues, there will be heartache, there will be misunderstandings, there will be continual forgiveness, there will be tears, and sometimes there will be a feeling of being lost if you two don't come together and do the necessary things that require us to have strong marital and family foundations. We are each responsible for ourselves, our actions, our words. And while we are responsible for these things, we all still have a right to how we feel from the words or actions of your loved one - it doesn't mean that we haven't taken responsibility for them, that we shouldn't become hurt or angry because he said or did something that would naturally make us feel this way, it just means that we are human. And because we are human we should embrace each other, care a little more, find the good things of each other each day, work towards a better marriage and continue working to enhance it in every way we can - we all have room for improvement no matter where you are at in your marriage. We all simply have room for improvement. Marriage can be wonderful, joyful, fun, happy, everything you dreamed of... but it takes hard work, sacrifice, forgiveness, setting our priorities straight, and finding what works for you.

I have a passion for marriage. It is God-centered, God-created. It is sacred and should be treated as this. Sometimes it is easy to feel like giving up, tossing in the towel, and not looking back but moving on elsewhere - but divorce is not easy, esp with children (which I will get to in some posts)... and remarriage is never easy, and remarriage with a stepfamily or blended family is that much harder. But it is worth every effort.

That love you felt in the beginning that might now be a distant memory, can still be yours.

My husband and I have had our share of rocky roads - between the whole remarriage (for both of us), to being in a stepfamily and all that entails, starting our own family just after marriage, to financial woes since we married etc. We are just now learning to come together, though for the last 7 years I thought we had been. We do love each other... we love our little family... we love life... and we want us to be in that life together... we want to do what we need to do to enhance our marriage and continue to do so for the rest of our days. I don't have a Ph.D in psychology, but I have had hands-on experience and discoveries that I want to share with you - in hopes to help you in your own journeys to a strong marriage.